Live free or Buy hard!!

Brilliant morning today isnt it dear friend?!

...and you know what makes it even better?....Its FRIDAY, baby!!...Yeah!!...there's something else too!...SALARYYY!!!....yes yes!!....today is salary day!!...So what are you gonna do with it this time?...go home?...buy presents?...treat yourself?....indulge?...pay your rent and bills??...Me?...Well!...can't go home, its too far!...who'd i buy presents for?....dont wanna indulge, would rather dance around in shorts at my room, than go to a spa!.....Paid my bills last week so i'm done for the month....so so so??...there's just one thing letf!!...yeah baby!...it's treatin' time!! :D

Anand

Ma! I'm in love!!

Heyy..


...i got this mail two days back...which had this really old cadbury ad...you knw, the one where the girls jumps onto the ground and starts dancing around after the batsman has hit a six!...it was so nice!!...made all the memories of the old ads come rushing back!!...remember the old milk corp. ad...the one which went doodh doodh doodh doodh, wonderful doodh!! :) ...or the ad for bajaj bulbs..."jab main chota bachcha tha, badi shararat karta tha...meri chori pakdi jaati....!....how about the really old Limca ad with, then slim, salman khan!...the bunnies from the lijjat papad ads?!...hehehe!...and that "Saari mein Saari Paraag saari!"...and "Vicco turmeric, nahin cosmetic, vicco turmeric ayurvedic cream!"...that fevicol ad with the bunch of men an elephant and Rajkumar Hirani??..yes yes...that dude who said "Furniture ka Saathi, Jiski nishani hai Haathi!" was the guy who made Munnabhai!!.....but you know, which one was my favorite?..."Yeh Zameen yeh aasma!...humaara kal, humaara aaj!...humaara kal, humaara aaj!...Buland bharat ki buland tasveeeeeeeeeeeer...HUMAAARA BAJAJ! HUMAAARA BAJAJ! HUMAAARA BAJAJ!"

Anand

Ps:..that another dairy milk ad...where amrita rao's wearing the blue saree and doing karvachauth rituals...aah that was so sweet...when i first saw that ad, i went up to my mum and said "i want to marry a girl like her!!"....what happened after that...is well...for you to know another day!! :D

The Jabber of the blabber!

Hey Hey....Gooodmorning!!...Happy Friday!!....

....You know its so weird!!....I started all this "blabber-jabbery" just for fun and now...it's like i cant wait to get cracking on another after i'm done with one....i spend the whole day thinking about what i'm gna write here and when the time comes it all just goes poof!...and i end up writing something entirely different....just here today i was gonna write about how this one incident changed as it passed from one ear to another....but see?....i've ended up writing something completely pointless!...

Anand

ps: its good that i write this when there's no1 around, otherwise it'd be pretty damn weird!....wt to do.....i cant write without emoting!

What Not to do on a weekend!

Hey y'all!!....

...i bet you're all pumped up fr the weekend?...you'll finally get some time to spend with that special someone!....well most of you!...aww...and for all the others...chin up fellas!!...being single is awesome!...plus you'll have so much time with yourself!....more than 50 hours!!...its a blessing i tell you!...you've got time to do so much by urslf!!...go to a crowded place ....i mean really crowded!....find a cafe...get a cuppa....get out of the cafe...find a place to sit with a good view of the folks around, orite....now look!...and make up stories....about them!....about where they came from!....about where they're going!...about how in an astonishingly complicated way they are somehow connected to you!....take my word for it, you'll have a blast!!...i do, every single time!!


Anand

Ps:...Name the characters in ur story....and you needn't K.I.S.S.!!

Pps:...K.I.S.S. -> Keep It Simple, Stupid!

Edible Nirvana!

Gooodmorning Dear Friend!...

...How are you?!...the weekend was a blast wasnt it?!...what did you do?!...i had Cake!...it was a Lemon Poppyseed Cake with Apple Icing!!....i tell you, having something that good makes you forget all your worries!...i mean the first spoonful(...or handful...whichever you prefer!) is the moment when you dont think about anything else...its like in the moment...everything around you ceases to exist...its just you...and your plate of cake...and nothing else!....NIRVANA!...screw obesity!...Gorge away!....when in doubt, nibble out!! :) Have a great week ahead!


Anand

all i want is you....

Hey hey pretty people! how's it going?!

...i figured since its the first day of the week!...todays mails should be about something which give people immense pleasure!...but the problem was i couldn't quite put my finger on that ONE thing which everyone likes!...that was before the small 40W bulb over my head started glowing!...now i know!...its FOOD!...every1 likes a good plateful!..everybody has that one dish which he/she cant refuse!...i have something like that!..and you know what's funny..?..i'm an out and out "chicky-tarian!"..i can eat anything with chicken in it...so you'd, naturally, imagine my fav dish to be non vegan!...but HA HA!...it isnt..i mean i like it...i crave for it...but its but it fills your heart efore it fills your stomach!...no no..the fav dish shd be something which you'd long for...every single day!...i have such a thing...its vegan...and it came from a dhaba...Last year i was driving back from Chandigarh to Delhi...and i found it...my one true love...rajma chawal!....with a dollop of desi ghee on top!....aah!...nothing even comes close!!

Anand

Ps: yeah yeah! i know! My children are gonna be FAT!

The parting of Noses!

Hey there dear friend!...

...How are you feeling today?!...aww come on, its morning!....Smile!....think about something which left a pleasant little mark in your head!...like a birthday!....yeah!...Your Birthday!...think about the first time you ever cut a cake!...well i'm sure you cant go back that far...but try and remember the earliest one!...what was that like?...i remember one such birthday!...it was the early 90's...the times of marutis and bajajs on the roads!...Uncle chips and Ruffles!....Campa cola and GoldSpot!...100% and kwality icecreams!...yeah those were the times!...that year my birthday fell on a sunday!....i cut my cake!...and had most of it myself...Thank god for DD and Ramayan!....people couldnt wait go back and watch Laxman cut Surpanakha's nose!...

Anand

The zipcode of the writer's block!

Goooodmorning!...how was your day yesterday?

...i was just thinking about what to write here today...and it just hit me...one of these days, i'm gna be a victim of writer's block!...its inevitable!...has to happen...no two ways about it!...but its gna be a long time before my brain-lines get clogged!!...you see, every1's a nut in their own way!...some people eat...some run...some workout...some sleep!...well..i, TALK!....that's what i do!...yeah there might somedays when i cant find a good icebreaker but you know, as soon as the dam collapses....out comes the flow!....the only thing is...content becomes secondary to quantity!...you know, what i want to say becomes, somewhat, like a male dancer in a Britney spears video....Unnecessary!....No one's gna pay any attention to him anyhow!!

Anand

Roll call!!

Dear Friend….

…Its such a nice day today isn’t it…the kinda day when you just cant stop smiling!...don’t you feel it?...it feels special!...or maybe its just me!....haan!...must be that!...its all because of my name!...i’m supposed to be happy…cant help it…I know your parents name you when you could barely open your eyes but I think that over time you somehow get connected to your name….and start imbibing qualities from it!...Did you ask your parents why they named you what they named you?...i did!...they said we wanted your name to start with A so that you’ll be in front of every roll-call!...WHAT?!...thank heavens Ekta kapoor didn’t start making soaps before ’86 other wise I’d be AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAANAND!....and No.1 in every attendance sheet!...eeeessshhh!

Anand

Ps: my school roll no. was 2….all thanks to AAKANSHA! :P

The Revenge of the Pissed!!

Goodmorning!!...how was your trip to office??..met someone nice??...haan haan!...i know!! :P

...its the most happening moment of my day!...that morning commute to the office!...you meet so many people…some happy…some cranky….and some who’ve, well, dozed off!...i toh usually have to stand while coming since my stop’s the last one so its even more fun!...the best expression is of the guy in front of you who’ll turnaround and give you a glare every time the bus goes over a speedhump!..”No dude! I didn’t put it there! I swear!...Please don’t kill me!”…but what’s more fun is giving him a solid elbow in the back when he’s least expecting it, to make up for all the glares!!...and when he turns around?....make one brow higher than the other and look at him…a word of caution though…back off with a smile if his brow goes higher than yours!

Anand

Sorry for being 'Bus'-sy!

Hey hey!! :D...Goodmorning!!

…Its nice to see little kids all ready for their bus to come in the morning isn’t it?...makes you feel like “Thank god, No more school for me!!”…it has probably been more than half a decade when you were that lil munchkin waiting for the bus in your school uniform…with your Pokemon bag…your Milton water bottle….your Id card safety-pinned to your shirt…. and your ever faithful “hanky!”…and lo!... your faithful lil yellow school bus wd cm…the grouchy driver wd look at you and shout “GET IN!”…you’d abide….scan the rows of seats….aah…your bus sweetie wd have an empty chair…you’d want to sit there…but no…you would wimp out at the last moment….take the seat behind her….and spend the entire journey thinking about what if you were sitting next to her....Must’ve happened to you?...surely!...No?....was it just me then?!....Damn!!

Anand :D

My Dhadkin' Dil!

Goodmorning again!!....

Its nice to see something beautiful in the morning isnt it?....The Astons and the Fiat are just gorgeous arent they?!....oh boy!...btw did you guys happen to check out Greenday's 25th Century Breakdown!....i'm telling you....its something worth keeping on your player!....My bus driver was playing Dhadke Jiya from aloo chaat somedays back, and you know what....that songs goooood!...really!...makes you feel really mushy and nostalgic....full memories of your first love come back like a splash of cold water on your face on a warm summer day!....the movie might have been craptastic....but the song...aaah!...Do check it out if you havent!

Anand

The Long and short of it...

Hey Dear Friend!..

How was your weekend?...Had fun?!....i certainly did!...i went to the barber's to get a cut and the dude was singing as he was snipping away!...i was thinking, dude why is he so happy??...is it because he's cutting my hair??....because how his team was performing well in the IPL??....because how UPA won the elections??...i sat there wondering as he went on with the job....i couldn't take it anymore...asked him as i was about to leave...couldn't risk asking him before as i was quite literally under his scissors!....he smiled....said...My stereo's broken!

Anand

Bench-op!!

Hey Hey!...

...Monday mornings are usually that time of the week when every1's all cranky, lazy and frankly a bit disappointed that the weekend's over!....but sometimes....somedays...it is that precise morning that you look forward most to!...like that monday, in school days, when after a long summer holiday, u were supposed to go back and tell every1 what you did during the vacations...and show off!! :P....or when you were waiting to see someone special after a looooooooooooooooooonnng wait!....someone who'd bring a smile on your face with just one word....someone....like my talent manager who's supposed to finally come back today and give us something to do!...Bench does weird stuff to a person's psyche, man!

Anand

To Mr. Mill and Mrs.Boon!

Hey!!

....These commentators on the telly....where do they get so much matter to talk about?!....i toh run out of words faster than those mysore Fc's running outta food!....i was talking to my school friend appu last night....BTW her mum's now my school's new princi!...but anyway...we were talking after a year and the best question i could come up with to ask her was....”Did you vote this time?!” ...AAAAHHH!....talk about lame!...

Anand


Ps:...yeah but she was reading mills and boons!...Why oh why?!...

Pps:…if you do like Mills and boons then I’m sorry….

Ppps:….not really….Mills and boons are still rubbish!

aah! the scent of success!!

Goodmorning....

...Its a wonderful morning today isnt it?....i like the rains...as long as i dont get wet that is...plus all the slush and mud on the streets....and the hyperactive reproductive cycle of the damn bugs!....but i guess all that's worth it...cz u knw that wonderful smell of the first drops falling on the sun parched ground just does smthing magical to you!...where were you the last time the airs filled with that beautiful scent....oh yeah...Mysore!


Anand

Chicken Soup for the Bored Soul

Hey!

...the bus is a wonderful place to look at people and try to fathom what they're like?....its like being a kid with a box staring at a book of black and white pictures...he can just see them....but what colors he fills in, depend on what he thinks of the pics.....that's what i do....i'm a 'color-filling-judging-douche!

'....Like this one time i was sitting with a lady who was calmly reading a book...i looked at her....glasses...western formals....a comprehensively oversized purse…fresh morning dew perfume and everything....She looked up at me....one eyebrow higher than the other....cleared her throat and carried on reading....the book was Chicken Soup for the Working Woman's Soul.....Guess she had skipped her breakfast that morning! ;)

Anand

Shh! i'm ad-libbin'

Hey!!

...have you ever tried looking at the telly with the volume muted?...of course you have!!....i especially like watching those candyfloss-run-around-the-tree hindi songs which the noise off!!....oh its abso-'fun'tastic-lutely brilliant!.....its like watching one of those early morning workout sessions!!....complete with steps and everything!...ONE---PELVIC THRUST---TWO---PELVIC THRUST---THREE---PELVIC THRUST---STEP----FLIP---LIFT CHICK----ROTATE LIKE A DOG CHASING ITS TAIL---PELVIC THRUST---PELVIC THRUST---PELVIC THRUST!!....heheheh!....i once tried it with a scene too...not too good...not nearly so when you ad lib OSO SRK's Yenna Rascala to Sholay Dharamji's KUTTE KAMIINE!....

Anand

Bus-ling bums!

Hey Hey!...

I'm not gna say much here except...If you have to travel in a bus make sure you're sitting in the aisle or the window seat....cz u nevr knw when you'll end up being the Cheese Slice between 2 humongous Buns(...or Bums!!)....:D


Anand


ps: The Rule doesnt apply when your both of your compadres are of the opposite sex! ;)

Daddius Arsificus!

Helloo!...

....well you might know a lot about me!...but there's one thing you dont know!....I'm a DAD!!....yes yes!...Main Baap Ban gayaa hoon!....Lotsa times!....now now!....before you open up a before you open up a can of contraceptive councelling on me, hear me out!.....i like my friends a lot....and their friends....and their friends...their friends!!...but sometimes...the people judging portion of my crania goes on the fritz...and i end up being palsy-walsy with people who, well lets just say they're the kind of people who shoudnt be left alone with your plate of food, if you know what i mean....and those folks....if they need smthing to be dn fr them....by me....start being all smiley-wiley and stuff!...and after the jobs done.....its usually BYE BYE NICE TO SEE YOU, SUCKER!....its like what sm1 said....Kaam nikaalne ke liye gadhe ko bhi baap banaana padhta hai!....Make the donkey your dad, if you need to get your way!...we'll i've been a dad a lotta times now....Baap re Baap!!

Donkey Dad!!